Winter 2025 Issue

EAST COAST EQUESTRIAN 23 Winter 2025 Dear Mal…Is it possible that my horse can re- member someone who was mean to him several years ago? I bought my horse three years ago from a person who was running a sort of “sketchy” barn. She was nice enough and was a competent manager. Unfortunately, there were people working in the barn who, I discovered a long time afterward, were not very nice. One of the people who had kept her horse at the barn reached out to me a few months ago to tell me that two of those barn workers had been charged with abusing horses. She told me that she had wit- nessed one of those workers beating my horse, and had reported him to the barn manager. I felt horrible, but what she told me made some things make sense to me. My horse Is wonderful, but sometimes he gets skittish for reasons I couldn’t understand. I know the people at the barn where I’m boarding him are nice and well-trained. My horse seems to get along with them, as well as the other horses at the barn. Two weeks ago, I was at a show near the barn where my horse came from. Several of the workers who were putting up and taking down jumps and grooming the footing in the show ring looked vaguely familiar to me. One started walking toward us and called my horse by his name. My horse pinned his ears and backed up, obviously upset. The guy laughed and said my horse was “still crazy.” The whole thing creeped me out, but I didn’t know what to do. Throughout the show, it seemed that guy was lurking along the ring, and my horse was freaking out. When we got back to the barn, and I put him in his stall, he still seemed upset, but I didn’t know what to do, other than to give him lots of pats and hugs. What do you think? How can I help my horse get past this? Sad and Confused Dear Sad and Confused…One of life’s terrible re- alities is that there are cruel people walking around, working in stores, barns, schools, etc. Sadly, your horse was a victim of one of those people. You can’t change what happened to him, but he is lucky that he wound up with a person like you, who is looking for ways to replace his bad memories with acts of kindness. Horses, like many of the animals we enjoy being around, are sentient creatures. They have rich emotional lives and long memories. So, yes, your horse can remember cruelty and the individuals who inflicted it. You can help your horse recover from the abuse he experienced. First, make sure your horse recognizes you as a trusted partner, by ensuring that every interaction with him begins with kindness and gentleness. Talk to the barn manager and make sure he or she understands your horse’s sad history. Also, if there’s a trainer who works at the barn, see if he or she can work with you on ways to build your horse’s confidence. Make sure that you are with your horse while the trainer works with him—both to ensure that you can continue working with your horse on your own, and to spot any signs that your horse is unnerved by any of the work. It will take time and patience as well as your commitment to give your horse the peaceful, happy life he deserves. Another thing you can and should do is review your state’s animal welfare laws. See if they are strong enough to truly protect animals from abuse. If they’re not, it’s on you to speak up. We are our animals’ most effective advocates. Dear Mal…my daughter Tammy is becoming an excellent rider. She has been taking lessons for several years and is hoping to start competing in local shows. Her trainer is a friend of ours, who is an accomplished equestrian. She told us that Tam- my is very talented and could do very well in shows. She also told us that Tammy’s abilities could get her scholarship money for college. My husband and I don’t have the kind of money that would give Tam- my the ability to go to lots of shows, but our friend said that she would love to take Tammy to shows and let her show her horses. It’s such a generous offer, but we’re worried about all the “extras” that Tammy would need. She rides in blue jeans and sweatshirts, and her riding boots are second hand from a local thrift shop. Tammy is thrilled that she might be able to finally compete, but we’re worried that our finan- cial limitations will wreck her dreams. Do you have any ideas? Worried Mom Dear Worried Mom…Your daughter is so lucky that your friend has been so generous with her time and her horses. I know I don’t have to tell you what a rare gift your friend is. This is a situation that has a lot of layers, don’t you think? The dilemma about show clothes is probably the simplest one to solve. The Equus Foundation merged several years ago with an organization called The Rider’s Closet, whose mission is to ensure that equestrians have access to riding apparel. They work with Pony Clubs, schools and individuals. You can find out more on their web- site, https://equusfoundation.org/riderscloset/rider- scloset.php The Rider’s Closet has been a wonderful asset to a lot of equestrians who would otherwise be shut out of competition because—as you know—the show clothing can be expensive. Tammy has an opportunity to explore a sport that is inaccessible to a lot of people, and she has that op- portunity because of your friend. I’m guessing that Tammy already does some work around the barn, helping take care of the horses and cleaning up af- ter them. I’m sure your friend would be thrilled if Tammy started winning lots of ribbons. But here you and Tammy have an opportunity to do more. Maybe Tammy could make something personal to give to your friend—perhaps she has a picture of one of the horses, or something like that she could frame and give. Maybe Tammy could “interview” your friend about how she came to love horses, or some of the things that are at the heart of her generosity. She could turn that interview into a booklet with pictures of the horses your friend loves. This is not to say that Tammy “owes” your friend something in return, but she clearly needs to find a way to express her appreciation. More importantly, Tammy can commit to being as selfless and generous as your friend, and find ways to pay this wonderful gift forward. Learn more about the advertiser’s services + products! Click on their ad and go directly to their website!