March 2022 Issue

EAST COAST EQUESTRIAN March 2022 Page 67 Go ahead...Ask da Mare By Malorie de la Mare Dear Mal… One of my closest friends— Eileen--has announced that she is having a “destination” wedding. At a dude ranch. In another state. Guests are being asked to dress in “ranch” attire— cowboy boots are encouraged. Members of the wedding party (I have been invited to serve as an attendant) will be on horse- back for a “parade” to the altar. I could list a thousand reasons why I’m stunned, embarrassed, upset, and otherwise unhappy about all of this. To start, she’s my friend, and I love her; we’ve been close for many years. We work together (we have great jobs!) and have always had a great relationship. I truly like her fiancé, too. BUT…I’m trying to wrap my head around her sudden, totally atypical decision to do something so…impracti- cal. The dude ranch looks nice and I’m sure the horses are nice. But I have never even touched a horse! The fiancé grew up on a small farm, but I don’t think he’s still involved with his family’s business. Eileen’s father died suddenly last year, and she and her family are still dealing with the shock and grief. He had been involved with horses as a trainer and coach many years ago, before Eileen was even born. These days she is practically giddy about how we’ll dress, the pre-wedding festivities, how ex- citing it will be to be out there in the sunshine with the horses and whatever else will be around… horseflies? I can afford the time and the expense and don’t want to puncture my friend’s balloon. But really, do you think this whole thing is outlandish? -Cranky Friend Dear Cranky… Usually when I hear the phrase “destination wedding,” my blood pressure starts spik- ing. Usually. C’mon, Cranky… it’s horses! And a dude ranch! Here’s what I really think about you, Eileen, fiancé, and this ranch thing. Your friend and her family are dealing with two extremes: grief over the death of Eileen’s father and joy about Eileen’s upcoming wedding. She’s your good friend, and in all the years of your friendship, did you ever talk about your dream wedding? No? Well, per- haps now is a good time to start. Friends dig deep into each oth- er’s hearts. Instead of standing on the sidelines kvetching and wondering if Eileen has gone crazy, take her out for a glass of wine, and ask her how you can help her plan this wedding. Ask her how she came up with the idea. Ask her if she thinks this Just Get on the Horse dude ranch wedding might make her feel closer to her father. Ask her if you can help her pick out dude-appropriate outfits for the attendants. Instead of looking at this as wildly impractical (espe- cially since it’s not going to be a financial hardship for you), look at it as an adventure that you, Eileen and your friends will be laughing about and reliving for years to come. As Helen Keller said, “life is either a daring adventure, or it’s nothing.” See? It’s that simple! Dear Mal… Help! My poor horse has what I think is rain rot on his back. The weather is miserable, so I can’t really give him a bath with that medicated shampoo. I feel so badly for him and worry that it can become a big prob- lem. He’s 31, and otherwise in excellent health. But I know that senior horses’ coats are not as resilient as those of young- er horses. I don’t blanket him because his coat is very thick, and he never seems to be chilly. What can I do? I’ve called the vet, who is being torn in a thou- sand different directions because he’s covering for several vets who have left their practices. Can you give me any ideas that can help my poor baby? The vet did tell me that it’s unlikely to be anything more serious than a cosmetic problem—although the scabs can be painful. Do you have any ideas? -Sad and Worried Dear Sad and Worried… Deep breath, please! Stay calm and take your horse some carrots. Your vet is correct that this is not likely to become serious. But of course you worry because you’re right there, up close, seeing these nasty patches and scabs on your precious horse. Let me tell you that I’ve been in your boots, and felt the same agony. Unless there is an indoor, heated wash stall where you can give your horse a bath and dry him well, you have limited options until the weather warms up. That doesn’t mean you have zero options, though. Rain rot is essentially a bacterial invasion. So, let’s start from square one. You don’t have control over the weather; if your horse is turned out in the rain, you need to make sure to dry him off when he comes in. Use a curry (gently) to loosen some of the scabs. Use an iodine solution (this might sting!) on the affected area. It might not resolve right away. But by being careful, and attentive, you can make things a lot better, and eventually you’ll be able to remove the scabs. It’s March, and with any luck warmer weather will arrive soon. Then, you’ll be able to give your horse a good, deep-cleansing bath. In the mean- time, if you notice that your horse is losing his appetite, or if he seems to be depressed, make sure your vet knows that things have changed, and your horse needs at- tention. Good luck, and give your horse a special hug for me. Have a question for Mal? Email her at PAEquest@aol. com.